school...

so school is crazy...i need to get back into the school mode..im so out of it that i feel like im in over my head...but like in my other post lets toast to the crazy times!!! lets hope i can get back intime to the school mode...i have three test and three papers due all in a week..aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh well wish me luch..i need all of it i can get!!!

I'm only human..thats my saving Grace

So today i was just thinking..something i try not to do lol...but i fell..i hate when i fall..if any of you know me well enough you will understand what i am saying...but there is a positive in falling!!! you feel so FREE!!! i feel like i have so many emotions running through me that i really cant understand them...so i guess i was hopping that if i came on here i would be able to write them down and i would feel free....its not so working as much as i thought i would...but is life ever working out how we thought it would? i know my life is like a card game...i never know what will happen next..in a way it is exciting..other times its kinda crazy..so i guess i will toast to a crazy, card, no understanding kind of life!! so bring on the fun and excitment!! bring on the good and bad times..i can and will take it being a positive person!!!

Dumb ASS

So in my courtship and marriage class we talked about making decisions and asking yourself if it will effect you postive or negative in time...well i so should of asked myself that last night...but sense i can not take it back or go back in time i might as well learn from it and move on right??? well i so should of learned from this four years ago...guess i am to stuborn to learn anything just once i am so cool i get to do it over and over!! ya for stupidness(i dont even know if that is a word but it fits my night last night)....so i just have to write this out and then maybe just maybe i will feel better..i want to say i feel bad but i just hate myself for thinking that i live my life for everyone but me...but when have i ever thought of just me...last night...two months ago...then for about six months then befor that it was like three to four years....i have a tendence to just be a screw up..but at least i can say my sins are not as bad as others...and i still might have a long way to go but at least i see where i want to go and i know how to get there...its just being smart enough to make it....